Same Boat
by jp92390
Summary: Naomi is a junior in college. She never really had any friends until she's forced to be partners with a certain little redheaded girl. Rating will most likely change in later chapters.  Thanks to FitchSwitch for the rating idea!
1. Chapter 1

Here's a little first chapter i decided to upload to see how you guys felt about my writing, so I'd appreciate it if you reviewed, and if you like it, I'll keep writing.

:D

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><p>"<em>Bzzt-Bzzt-Bzzt-Bzzt—"<em>

Smack.

"Ughh.." Naomi groaned, turning on her side. The alarm meant the one thing she had been dreading; school. It was the first day of her junior year in college. "Christ's sake, 21 years old, I should fucking be done with school already." She pulled herself out of bed, dragging her way into the bathroom.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Her mother's perkiness was ever-so-present this morning.

"Jesus, Mum. D'you think you could tone it down a bit, yeah?" Naomi turned the faucet, water spurting out like an upside down geyser.

"Oh, I'm sorry dear. But I just love it when you're awake with me in the mornings. It's nice to know someone's feeling just as miserable as I am." Heh. Miserable. That was hard to believe. "Well, I'm off to work, see you tonight, right?" She pranced over, pecking Naomi on the cheek.

"Yeah, sure. Whatever Mum." Naomi stripped, stepped into the shower, and let the warmth of the water embrace her.

She found herself standing outside of Roundview College at a time she found to be way too early to even function. '_Thank God for coffee.' _She took a long gulp of her coffee before beginning her ascent into hell. Every step up, she kept repeating the same word in her head. '_Fuck.' _Step. _'Fuck.'_ Step. _'Fuck.´_ Step. No matter how hard she wanted to stop and pull herself away, she couldn't. It was like she was literally being pulled in by some invisible hand extending, most likely, from Professor Blood himself. After what seemed an eternity, she reached the doors, hesitated, cursed once more, and then finally opened them, taking her first steps of the year into the lair of Satan himself.

Class, after class, after class. They seemed to drag on forever, and by lunch, she could almost repeat the speech every teacher gave on that first day word for word. She stepped outside for a cigarette, the warm summer's air and the nicotine relaxing her and clearing her mind of school for the time being. She stepped into her own dream world. A place where she could sleep all day, and get drunk with her friends on the weekends. Except she didn't really have any friends. Everyone in Bristol were wankers, nobody she'd want to be friends with. So maybe she'd just get drunk with her cat. And there would be no other people in the world. Just her and her cat.

The bell ending lunch forced her back into reality where, sadly, other people existed, and there was not a single cat in sight. Naomi sighed, "Fuck. Just 4 more classes." She reluctantly strolled back inside, finding her way to her next lesson. She entered the classroom, seating herself in the farthest in the corner, behind a dark hair boy styling some black rimmed glasses. He turned around expectantly and held out a hand.

"Hi! I'm K—"

"Piss off."

He tucked his hand away quickly, almost whimpering, and turned around again.

"Fuck's sake," Naomi muttered to herself.

"Well you're quite the charmer, aren't you? Mind if I sit here? Everywhere else is taken." The voice was unknown. It was slightly rough, but definitely a girl. Naomi didn't bother looking to admire her new neighbor.

"Yeah, whatever. Go for it." Naomi set her bag on her desk, resting her head on it, hoping to doze off like she had in every other class she'd already attended.

"Hey, you! Blondie, in the corner!" Naomi lifted her head to find herself almost face-to-face with her teacher. "You are not to sleep in my class, I'm not taking' any shit either. Now get the hell up and pay attention." The gruff man made his way back into the front of the room, turned about-face, and eyed Naomi suspiciously. "Now you're all going to listen to me now. I'm only going to say this once. I'm Mr. Cassan, your new English Literature teacher. As I have already mentioned, I'm not taking any of your guys' shit, so if you're not going to take this class seriously, then get the hell out." He hesitated a moment, looking around as if he was actually expecting some students to get up and leave. "Yeah, just as I thought. Most of you are now in your third year of college, so it's nice to know you're actually thinking like the adults you're becoming." He propped himself up on the corner of his desk, and continued again. "I understand all of you are probably getting bored of hearing the same damn lectures over again. So I'm going to trust that you guys know what to do and give you your first assignment." He turned to the closet on his left, removing a stack of books from it. "I want you guys to partner up with the person next to you, read the first five chapters of this book, and then prepare a presentation on what you guys feel is the most important theme presented thus far. It's called Heart of Darkness, written by Joseph Conrad, published officially in 1902. I'm going to hand these out to you, then let you loose."

Naomi sighed, shutting her eyes. She hated group work, she had usually been stuck working with some tosser. She began rummaging through her bag for a notebook while anxiously tapping her fingers on the desk.

"Hey, Blondie, why don't you work with little Red, sitting right next to you? Maybe you'll make a _friend!" _He let out a sort of chuckle, sounding quite disgusting.

_'Heh. Friends, right.'_ "Whatever you say, _sir."_ Naomi muttered to him in response. She shifted to face her new "friend", to find that she had already begun reading. She felt kind of bad for interrupting, but they did need to discuss what they were going to do.

"So, uh..How d'you wanna do this, presentation, thing?" She tapped her pen anxiously against her leg.

"Well, we won't be able to read the first five chapters in a single class period, so maybe we should work on it outside of class." The tone Red had just used made Naomi feel like an idiot. "How about we meet up, after school, just out front? Then we can go back to yours or mine, whichever you prefer." Red glanced at her briefly, shrugged, and continued reading.

"Um, yeah. Sure. Alright." Naomi turned back in her seat, facing forward again. She picked up her own book and began to read.

"My name's Emily, by the way. Pleasure."

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><p>Yeah, really short. Sorry, but again, just to see how you all feel about my writing.<p>

Let me know if I should write more :D


	2. Chapter 2

_Well, I was hoping for a few more reviews before uploading this chapter, but I was bored. SO YEAH.._

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><p>She stood outside, waiting, the nicotine from her cigarette filling her lungs with intoxicating poisons.<p>

'_I've been standing here for ten fucking minutes. Where is this girl? What was her name again…?'_

"Hey."

Naomi was startled by the redhead she had become familiarized with in her English class.

"Oh, hey…Erica?"

"Um, no. Emily."

"Right, Sorry."

Naomi sighed, letting her eyes fall shut for a brief moment.

"D'you have a spare fag?"

Naomi glanced towards Emily skeptically.

"Um, Yeah. Here. Didn't think you were a smoker."

"Yeah, well, you don't actually know me." Emily retorted back, lighting the cigarette, then blowing out harshly.

"Yeah, you're right. Sorry." Naomi sighed once more, this time showing irritation. She waited for Emily to make the first remarks about their plans. They ended up standing there in silence for a few moments.

"D'you even care about this assignment?" Emily had practically yelled, reminding Naomi that she was actually there.

"Um, yeah, sure." Naomi shrugged.

"Really now?" Emily's eyes were locked onto her, practically boring holes through her skull, making it feel like she could read Naomi's mind.

"Umm. Yeah, really." Emily continued staring at her. "No, I guess not." Emily's stare relaxed, and she chuckled.

"Yeah, Didn't think you were much of a caring person." Emily discarded her cigarette into the trash, returning quickly. "Well, I do. D'you mind at least helping me? I mean, this is supposed to be a 'group effort', so don't be a selfish twat, yeah?"

Naomi was taken aback. "You're fucking kidding me right? You don't even fucking know me, so don't come along calling me a selfish twat just because _I_ don't care about some bullshit assignment. Fuck this, I'm leaving." Naomi ripped her bag from the floor and began pounding down the steps of the school.

"No wait! I didn't mean it!" Emily quickly followed suit. "I'm sorry." Naomi continued walking, Emily grew desperate. "Alright, I'm being the twat, I'm sorry!" Naomi slowed, eventually stopping. Reluctantly, she turned to face Emily, who was slowly making her way to Naomi. "Okay, let me try it again. I know you don't care, but would you _please_ help me? I would like to get a decent mark on this, but I can't do it alone." She was pouting, and it was like she had become a completely different person.

Naomi couldn't help but feel sympathetic.

"Alright, I'll help you. But I'm gonna warn you, this book's boring as shit."

"How d'you know?"

"I've read it before, duh?"

"So you already know what happens?"

"Yep."

"Shit, this is gonna be a fucking breeze then." Emily began giggling, but stopped abruptly when Naomi threw her a disgusted look. "What? What's that look for?"

"I already told you, this book's boring as shit. I don't see why you're laughing about it." Naomi giggled in a mocking manner. "So, what are we doing then?"

"Well, we could go to mine or yours. I have a dorm here on campus, so it's probably closer."

"Well, my mum's home, and I don't want to deal with her, so let's go to yours."

"Fine."

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><p>Emily's dorm was simple. There was a bed, neatly made, a stereo in the corner, with a remarkable cd collection, and a small desk with a lamp, covered in books. Emily tossed her bag on the ground, Naomi following.<p>

"Welcome to my _home_" Emily held her arms out and did a quick turn, motioning to the small space they were in. "Sorry there's not much, I didn't pack much from home, my sister Katie wouldn't let me bring much of our things."

Naomi gave a faint smile, and actually meant it. "It's nice. Simple. _Clean._ I like it."

Emily placed herself on her bed, gesturing Naomi to do the same.

"So, Naomi, tell me a bit about yourself." Naomi look at Emily quizzically. "What's that face for? I'm not trying to like, _fuck_ you or anything, I just want to know you. Like friends." Naomi was unchanged. "Like…do you have any siblings?"

"Nope."

'Um..tell me about your friends?"

"Non-existent."

Emily's pleased facial expression quickly changed to disappointment. She though quietly for a second, for some way to change the awkward subject, and her face lit up once more.

"I know! How about your favorite band?"

"I don't know."

"Song?"

"No clue."

Emily slumped down against the wall, admitting defeat. "You're no making this very easy, you know."

"Sorry. Guess everything I do is just so difficult."

Any joy that had been present was replaced by a small fit of tension.

"That's not what I meant."

"Yeah, but it's what everyone else usually means so I'm not sure it makes a difference."

"But it does. I'm not everyone else. I'm Emily."

"Okay. Whatever."

There was a few moments of silence. It seemed like hours. Naomi had begun fingering the buttons on her flannel, while Emily copied with her hair. Emily kept chancing glances at Naomi, while Naomi pretended not to notice. Soon, Naomi gave in to Emily's wanting glances and spoke up.

"So Emily, why don't _you_ tell me a bit about _yourself_?" Naomi tried perking herself up to seem interested, but couldn't bring herself to pull it off. She just slumped back into her previous position, then felt Emily looking to her.

"Do you actually care?

Naomi hesitated, withdrawing to her own mind for a moment '_Naomi, you do care. You know you do. She's nice, seems like a friend. She's your first friend since middle school you twat, at least try.'_ She found herself to actually be quite interested after that brief scolding of herself.

"Yes, actually. I do. I'm not a _selfish twat_, you know." Naomi smirked, causing Emily to blush and giggle slightly.

"Well, I have a twin sister Katie, who is a complete cow and a little brother, who is definitely gay." Emily giggled slightly, along with Naomi. "I like the color red. And I want to major in biology." Emily smiled, "That's it."

Naomi gestured towards the cd collection with the stereo. "No favorite band?"

"Um, it changes daily. I don't really know either."

Naomi then gestured to the books. "How about a favorite book?"

Emily looked towards the book and seemed to suddenly be immersed in thought.

"Hello? Emily?"

"What? Oh sorry. Um, I don't really know that either." She sat there for a second, just staring. Naomi shifted her position on the bed, suddenly feeling like she was invading Emily's space.

"Hey Emily, do you want me to go or something? We can work on this assignment tomorrow or something.."

"No, don't. I mean, unless you want to of course.." Emily looked up at Naomi, who was now standing. Something was different, Her big brown eyes were full of joy, but now they seemed emotionless. No, there was a tinge of sadness. It was barely noticeable, but just enough for Naomi to catch it.

"Well, you just seemed tired, or something. I don't want to be a bother.."

"No, please don't leave. I haven't had a friend since I left London in grade 11." Emily looked as if she had just seen a ghost. Her face turned bleach white. Clearly she had spoken more than she wanted.

Naomi stood still for a moment, her only movement being some awkward fidgeting. When she found the courage, she moved back to the bed, sitting next to Emily and placed a friendly arm around her.

"Looks like we're in the same boat. My last friend was my cousin. Then she moved away." Naomi felt Emily readjust herself to fit comfortably in Naomi's side.

"When I was in grade 11, I told Katie that I was gay. She was my sister, so I figured I could trust her and she'd understand. Then she freaked and told everyone. My mum shipped me to live with my aunt here in Bristol, hoping my aunt would 'fix me', but luckily my aunt isn't a cunt like everyone else in my family. She's the only person I've had since then." Emily was crying now, and Naomi rubbed her arm softly.

"Emily, you're gay?" Naomi questioned her softly, careful not to sound bother by it.

Emily nodded slowly. "You can leave if you're too afraid I'll try to fuck you, or something ridiculous." Emily sighed, and Naomi pulled her closer, into a hug.

"Yep, it looks like we're in the same boat."

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><p><em>So yeah, sorry if it's short, I was just beasting at this writing, but I have a lot of ideas which I might save for later<em>

_reviewwwwwwww ;)_


	3. Chapter 3

_Another chapter, I hope it's alright._

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><p>A week had passed since Naomi and Emily's first day as 'friends'. It felt weird to Naomi, the way they had both opened up to each other so quickly and easily.<p>

_ "Emily, you're gay?" Naomi questioned her softly, careful not to sound bothered by it._

_Emily nodded slowly. "You can leave if you're too afraid I'll try to fuck you, or something ridiculous." Emily sighed, and Naomi pulled her closer, into a hug._

"_Yep, it looks like we're in the same boat."_

_Emily looked up, her eyes blinking wildly with confusion and curiosity._

"_Naomi, what-are you saying that-are you gay?"_

_Naomi nodded with a firm smile. "Yep."_

_Emily pushed herself up, freeing herself from Naomi's hug. A small giggle spilled from her mouth_

"_What are you giggling at?"_

_Emily smiled. "I was just _so_ afraid that you were going to be freaked out by it or something, but I couldn't stop myself from letting it spill out." She shuffled a bit, bringing her legs up, and sat cross-legged on the bed, leaning against the wall. She was relaxed now, even though she had just spilled some of her most personal 'secrets' to someone who was almost a complete stranger. But she had never felt better in her life. _

_ A few moments passed by, in silence. But it wasn't an awkward silence. The atmosphere in the room was light, both girls couldn't think of anything to do but smile. Naomi eventually pushed herself up, off of the bed, and over to the stack of book. Rummaging through them, she recognized some, but most were new to her. She was shocked, mainly because she had read so many books, she felt she could fill an entire library in her own mind. She picked up a book, walked to the window, and opened the book to a random page. Skimming the book she found a quote that had stuck out._

"_I may die young, she said, but at least I'll die smart. Now, back to tangents." Naomi recited it loudly and clearly, shifting her gaze out the window. There were only a few seconds of silence before the redhead on the bed spoke up._

"_Looking for Alaska, John Green." She stood and joined Naomi next to the window. "I think that might be my favorite actually. Have you ever read it?"_

_Naomi closed the book, admiring the cover. It was mainly black, with a green candle at the very bottom. A trail of smoke extended from the candle's tip, reaching the top of the cover. "No, I haven't."_

"_You should. D'you wanna borrow it?"_

"_Sure" Naomi threw a casual smirk at Emily." I'll have it back to you by tomorrow, in class."_

_The rest of their day in Emily's room wasn't very exciting; they talked mostly about literature and music. Naomi found out that Emily's favorite band was actually The Carpenters, and that she too enjoyed drinking alone, because she also had no friends. Correction. She had a new friend, named Naomi. They had come to an agreement that that weekend, they were going to go out. Get fucked to the point that they could honestly and truly forget everything and everyone who had fucked them over in the past._

_The rest of the week had gone in a flash. The pair completed their assignment, scoring an easy A thanks to Naomi and the fact that she had already read the book, analyzing every possible detail she could, no matter how boring it had been. It's not like she had anything better to do._

Naomi woke on Friday, feeling as she had every other morning. _'Fuck school, fuck society, fuck people.'_

She arrived at college a bit early, and wasted the remaining time until classes started with a cigarette, as she usually did.

"Naomi! Hey!" Emily came up beside her, and Naomi immediately offered her a cigarette. It had become a habit over the week, but today Emily declined. "No thanks, there's this girl coming in soon. She's kinda cute, I have a tiny crush on her, but she absolutely detests smoking." Emily stood on her toes, scanning the crowd, most likely searching for the girl.

Naomi couldn't help but feel a pinch of anger. '_A crush? I need to find this girl, I doubt she's good enough for Emily. Wait a minute, what the fuck am I thinking? I don't know Emily's _type,_ this isn't up to me.'_ Naomi scolded herself, sighing from irritation.

"Hey, Naoms, what's up? You okay?" Emily looked at her casually.

'_No, I'm not fucking okay. You have a crush on some other girl—What the fuck am I thinking? I don't own Emily, she's allowed to want whoever she wants. You're not her fucking mother.'_ Naomi's mind was racing with a thousand different thoughts. Why was she getting upset because Emily wanted another girl? They were friends, she should have been happy for her. _'Christ's sake Naomi, you don't _like _her or anything...do you? No, you can't. You're her friend, and besides, you've known her for like a week now?'_ Naomi suddenly found herself unable to be in Emily's presence. "Oh shit, Emily. I just realized. I forgot something at home. I gotta go, but I'll see you later, yeah?" She turned away from the redhead before a reply came, and bolted down the steps. She followed the sidewalk until it met the street, and she darted across the road, seemingly unaware of any oncoming traffic. She walked briskly and quickly, fighting the tears that threatened to fall. In a matter of minutes, she found herself on her street. She sped up to a jog, and eventually she ended up on the doorstep of her home. Pushing the door with a great fore, she stumbled through the door and slammed it shut. There, she stood quietly for a few minutes. She looked around, as if she was entranced. She looked at everything as if it was something she had never seen before. Her mind was so shaken up, she couldn't get anything straight. She made her way up the stairs, trying to find her own bedroom. She forced herself through yet another door, and finally recognized her own room. Her haven. The only place she could feel like everything was okay. But before she realized what was she was doing, she hurled her bag across the room, shattering her favorite lamp. The glass flew, and for a second, Naomi thought that her mind had gone with it. Everything flowing through It stopped, and she stood there completely emotionless for just few brief seconds, before it all came rushing back, hitting her like the unstoppable force, and she was the immovable object. Her knees gave out, and she crumpled to the floor in a sophisticated lump. Finally, the tears she had been fighting for what felt like forever, fell.

Naomi sat there for what felt like forever. In reality, it had only been two hours, which was still a while. She dozed off slightly, making the time nothing but fog in her mind. She felt her phone vibrate, and it brought her back to the real world. She got up, moved to her bed, and reluctantly checked her phone. She had figured it would just be a text from her mother, informing her that she was going to have another 'late night.' But when she saw the name, she nearly hurled the phone across the room to join the lamp.

It was _Emily._

She wasn't sure of what was going on with her mind and Emily. It was like Naomi the person was only Emily's friend, but Naomi the soul had so much love, and also hate, for Emily, that the text almost relieved her.

'_Hey Naoms, everything okay? You never came back, I'm a little worried.'_

Her hand quivered while she tried to think of what to say. If she wanted to say anything at all. Her fingers hesitated over the buttons, while her mind raced through the hundreds of things she wanted to say to find something acceptable.

_ 'Yeah. Just feeling a little under the weather, so I don't think I'm coming back. I'll see you tomorrow though?'_

Naomi let out a heavy sigh, leaning against the wall her bed was propped against. She let the tension in her hands out, and her hands slowly slipped out of her lap, landing carelessly on her bed. It was all too soon before she felt her phone vibrate again.

_'Oh, okay. Feel better! (:'_

Naomi decided not to bother with a response. She pushed herself up and walked to her closet. She had still been in her clothes, and searched for something more suitable for sleeping. She realized it was still early, but didn't care. She just needed her mind taken from reality, just for a little while.

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><p><em>I know my chapters are kind of short, so I'm going to try harder to make them longer.<em>

_Please review too, I don't want to keep adding chapters if this story is actually shit.  
><em>


	4. Chapter 4

Emily left college that day feeling particularly lonely. She sat through her classes, unable to focus very well. She was concerned about Naomi because of her abrupt departure, while thinking about the weekend, hoping Naomi would still be able to make it. But she knew she cared more about Naomi's health, so if she was really suffering, she would rather be with Naomi at her house than force her to go to some shitty club.

Emily walked through the double doors leading to the outside world of Bristol. It was a nice day, very bright and sunny. But it wasn't too warm. It was actually a rather perfect day. She stood off to the side a bit, waiting for the crowds of people to clear up before she left. She hated trying to maneuver through the crowds at the end of the day, it was practically impossible. She spent those few moments deciding on what to do with the rest of her day. It was too nice to go and sit in her dorm for the rest of the night like usual, and she actually had a friend now. People with friends don't just sit in their dorms on such a nice Friday night. '_Maybe I'll go visit Naomi, make sure she okay. I hope she doesn't mind.'_ With that, Emily began her descent down the stairs and followed the sidewalk that would lead her off campus. She had only visited Naomi's house once, and hoping that she didn't get herself lost, she began her journey to Naomi's. Luckily, she had remember correctly, and found herself knocking on Naomi's door within twenty minutes. The door was opened by an older blonde woman, who Emily took to be Naomi's mother.

"Um, hello. I'm Emily, is Naomi around?" She asked the woman shyly, feeling a bit guilty about showing up uninvited.

"Um, yes dear. I think so. Let me get her."

Emily waited in silence on the doorstep. She could hear the conversation between Naomi and her mother from where she was.

"Naomi? Naomi. Naomi! Get up, you've got a visitor, she's waiting downstairs."

If there had been a reply from Naomi, it was too quiet for Emily to hear.

"Naomi, what are you doing lying in bed still? Did you even go to your classes today?"

Emily shifted in her spot uncomfortably, and was about to turn to leave when she her someone pounding back down the steps.

"I'm sorry dear, she's being rather difficult today. You can just go on up to her bedroom." The older woman motioned her inside, but Emily rejected it.

'Um, no, it's okay then. It's not important—"

"Oh, nonsense! Come on now, I won't bite you." Naomi's mother pulled her inside by her arm. "I'm Gina, by the way. Her mother."

Emily smiled faintly, feeling slightly queasy. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"And you as well, Emily. Naomi might not be feeling to well, she doesn't typically cut her classes, But go on up anyways, she's just laying on her bed." Gina then left Emily standing alone at the foot of the stairs. Emily carried herself up, clinging her bag tightly to her. The stairs took her to a dimly lit hallway where, at the end, a lime green door was pushed open just slightly. Hoping that was Naomi's room, she slowly walked towards it and pushed open the door. Sure enough, her blonde friend was lying on the bed, faced away from the door.

"Hey." Emily started, setting her bag down and shutting the door. Naomi rolled over quickly, her face showing a bit of a shocked expression. '_Why is she so surprised?'_ Emily decided not to push the subject. "How are you feeling?" She saw Naomi gulp, revealing a sense of nervousness.

"Um, a little better." Naomi's voice was raspy, and she sounded like she hadn't had water in days. "How was-umm-how was college?"

Emily relaxed a bit. She hadn't realized her body had tensed up. "Shit. Just like every other day." Emily sat herself on Naomi's bed. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright, you left rather quick this morning." Emily gave her a tiny smile, wondering if Naomi had even caught it.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm alright, thanks." Naomi gave her a small smile in return, showing her appreciation for Emily's concern. "Did I miss anything too important today?"

"No, Mr. Cassan just assigned us more reading." Emily sighed, kicking off her shoes. She caught Naomi looking at her now bare feet, almost anxious. "You don't mind, do you?" She wriggled her feet, wordlessly asking Naomi for permission to take her shoes off.

Naomi snapped back to herself. "What? Oh yeah, it's fine. Go ahead." Naomi laid back down on her bed and shut her eyes, simulating sleep.

'_Wow, she's really beautiful when she sleeps.'_ Emily caught herself want to reach out and stroke Naomi's cheek. She looked so peaceful, and right now, Emily took in all her beauty fully for the first time. _'No, she's just beautiful in general.'_ Her blonde hair matched the complexion of her skin perfectly, and she was adorned in a simple cami that framed her figure perfectly. The blanket was pulled just up to where her navel was, so Emily was unsure if Naomi was even wearing pants. _'Mmm, no pants would be nice.'_ Emily quickly realized what she was thinking and suddenly felt very creepy. This girl was her friend, she shouldn't be picturing her naked. _'You fucking creep, quick thinking like this.'_ She glanced back at Naomi, unsure if she was even conscious still. _'She'd never go for someone like me anyway. She deserves someone so much better than me.'_ Emily pushed any thoughts of her and Naomi together from her mind, and reached out to pat the blonde's leg. "Naomi, are you still awake?" The blonde only stirred, and Emily guessed that she had indeed fallen asleep again. Reluctantly forcing herself up from Naomi's bed, she slipped her shoes back on and collected her bag from its place next to the door. She went to pull the door open to leave, but felt herself being drawn back to Naomi's bed. She chuckled to herself slightly before bending over Naomi's sleeping figure. "Heh, you're too cute. Goodnight, Naomi." She pecked Naomi on the cheek, now hoping that she was definitely asleep. After not receiving a response from the blonde, she felt content and left the room, took herself down the stairs, and out the door.

After hearing the door slam shut, Naomi's eyes flew open, revealing her clear, crystal blue eyes.

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><p>Naomi and Emily made their way down the street to find the club they had been planning on attending that night. They had both had a few drinks prior, and were feeling quite light. They were cutting through the park to save some time when an unfamiliar voice called to them.<p>

"Hey, do you have an extra fag?" They were approached by a slender, tall brunette. Her face was dotted with light freckles, and she fashioned a white sleeveless shirt with dark jeans and a simple pair of converse.

"Uh, yeah. Here." Naomi rummaged through her purse for her cigarettes, handing the brunette a pair when she found them. "There you go!" She laughed happily, amused by some unknown force. She smiled sheepishly at the brunette, then looked to Emily, who was giggling and blushing slightly. The brunette smirked back at them, gesturing thanks with a nod. Naomi and Emily continued their walk to the club, and when they finally found themselves there, they stumbled inside and feeling the bass of the music through the floor, began dancing immediately.

_-Ohohohoh  
>I'm in love with Judas, Judas-<em>

Naomi carried herself to the bar, fetching drinks for herself and Emily, repeating this process multiple times. At one point, she decided to check her phone and found it was almost 2 a.m. She motioned to Emily that she was stepping outside for a cigarette, secretly hoping Emily would follow. She didn't want to think about what might have happened when she was out. Emily had been bouncing from girl to girl, dancing and kissing and touching all of them. Naomi couldn't bring herself to be angry, though. She had convinced herself it was just the alcohol that was making Emily act this way. But the jealousy was still rising. She made it outside quickly, and chanced a look behind her to see if Emily had followed. But no one was there.

_'Ehh, I didn't really think she'd come.'_ Naomi stood against the wall, and glanced around anxiously. When she felt confident enough, she lit up her cigarette and let herself relax. She had taken a few drags of her cigarette when a newly familiar voice was heard beside her.

"Hey, you." Naomi turned to see the brunette from the park. "You look like you're having a good time." The brunette turned and joined Naomi against the wall.

"Oh, yeah. I'm fucking ecstatic right now." She felt the pack of cigarettes in her hand being tugged slightly from her grip and heard the clicking of a lighter. Opening her eyes, she spotted the brunette returning her lighter and cigarettes. Naomi grunted, showing her displeasure. "You're fucking welcome."

"Thanks."

Naomi glared at the old-new face, feeling angry. "Can I ask what you're doing here?"

"Didn't catch your name earlier." She winked at Naomi, and continued. "Effy." She stated it simply and held out her hand. Naomi's glare dropped to the extended hand, and rejected the handshake.

"Naomi." She huffed. "_Pleasure."_ Her sarcastic tone was meant to be a bit insulting, but the brunette was unfazed.

"Ooh, well aren't you just a _sweetheart?_" Effy smirked, discarding her cigarette butt. "Well, if you're going to be such a cunt, I guess I'll see you later." With that, Effy pushed herself from the wall, and walked inside of the club. Just as she walked through the doorway, she cast a final look at Naomi, grinning slyly. Naomi chose to light one more cigarette before carrying herself inside.

When she reentered the club, she made her way immediately to the bar, ordering another drink. While she waited, she turned her back to the bar, scanning the crowd. She tried to convince herself that she was just looking at all of the people, but she knew deep down, that she only wanted to find Emily. She felt a light tap on her shoulder, and turned around to accept her drink from the pretty girl who was bar-tending. She took her first gulp quickly, the alcohol burning her throat profusely. The rest she took in slowly, still scanning for Emily. She had finished her drink and was about to order another when something caught her eye. Some_one_ caught her eye. She stepped forward to get a better look.

That's when she saw Effy.

Effy was dancing, and Naomi could see a pair of arms holding her by the waist. Effy was holding a strong, almost vengeful looking smirk. Naomi couldn't help her curiosity, and stepped forward to get a view of the entire situation.

That's when she saw Emily.

Emily's arms were draped around Effy's waist, and the expression on Emily's face was one of pure joy. Naomi felt that it was the most pleased look she had ever seen anyone wear. She felt her insides boiling. She returned her gaze to Effy, who had caught her staring. Giggling slightly to herself, Effy reached a hand up, placing it on Emily's cheek, and gave Emily a strong kiss. Naomi could almost feel the passion and intensity in it. She saw Emily kiss back, and experienced the worst few moments of her life. When their kiss finally ended, Effy looked back to Naomi, and smiled. She knew she had gotten Naomi worked up, and her work was done. She pulled Emily's hands from her waist, said her quick goodbyes, and left the club. Naomi stood rooted to the spot, and saw Emily glance over at her. Emily began making her way over, and only then did Naomi find the strength to move. She walked forward briskly, purposely bumping Emily. She heard Emily's footsteps trailing behind her.

"Naomi, where are you going!" Emily yelled frantically.

"Getting the fuck out of here."

"Naomi! Naomi, what the fuck?"

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><p><em>Hurray for a little longer chapters!<em>

_I actually had alot of fun writing this chapter, but it might be shit, so sorry. I'm never confident in my work._

_And I think Judas is a great fucking song, and it was also the first one that came to mind when thinking about clubs and dancing, etc._

_Please review (:  
><em>


	5. Chapter 5

Sleep evaded Emily that night. Hours were spent tossing and turning, going out for a smoke then coming back in just to go out again for another. She had left the club, trying to catch Naomi. It was early when they left, barely 11p.m. She'd lost Naomi when she turned down a side street, and decided just to return to her dorm. So many things were living on her mind. _'Why did Naomi just run off like that? What was she so upset about? Was it because of Effy and I? No, it can't be. I mean, we're not dating. Maybe something happened to her at the club, something that I missed. I should call her. Or text her. I want to do something. I need to know she's okay.'_

Emily went to reach for her phone, but when she glanced at the clock, she realized it was almost 3 a.m. _'Shit, it's really late. I'll call her first thing tomorrow.'_ She returned to laying on her bed, becoming immobilized by the plain patterns on the ceiling just barely illuminated by her dim lamp. She laid there for a few minutes before getting up and advancing to her stereo. _'Maybe I'll put on some quiet music. Something nice, something slow.'_ After rummaging for a few moments, she found a fitting album. She sat on her bed again, picking up a book from her table, mindlessly running her fingers across the cover. The music was engulfing her, thankfully. It pushed everything from her night away and the only thing that flowed through were the peaceful melodies and intelligent lyrics.

'_If you be my star, I'll be your sky._

_You can hide underneath me and come out at night._

_When I turn black and you show off your light,_

_I live to let you shine.'_

For the first time since leaving the club, Emily felt at peace. The music finally lulled her to sleep for a few brief hours, until the sun peeking through her window brought her out of her slumber around 8 a.m. After stepping outside for a smoke, she showered quickly, washing off the evidence of the previous night. She decided not to bother with getting a proper outfit together, her only plans were to go visit Naomi, maybe. If Naomi was willing to talk. She dressed herself simply in a pair of comfortable jeans, a dark blue v-neck, and her favorite sneakers. Pulling on her favorite sweater and scarf as well, she stepped outside and began walking in the direction of Naomi's house. Even if Naomi wouldn't talk, Emily didn't plan on staying in her dorm all day. She planned on traversing Bristol that day, if Naomi didn't cooperate.

She walked through the park, taking in the images of everything around her. She watched a mother, who looked no more than 23, as she tried to wrestle two identical little girls to the ground playfully. _'Must be nice, to have a family.'_ She never had any memories of playing with her mother and sister as children. Katie was always stealing the attention of her mother, so Emily had adapted to loneliness. Growing up, she had a rabbit that was given to her as a present for her birthday one year. She named him Lorca, after her favorite writer, Her mother would read her his plays at night before going to sleep. She spent every day playing with him. She loved him more than anything in the world. Except for Katie, of course. No matter how much she had despised the amount of attention Katie had gotten, she was still her twin. No one could have a closer relationship than they, and Emily had always hoped it would stay that way.

But then Emily learned how it felt to be betrayed and abandoned by those you loved most. That's when she had given up on becoming close to anyone. After she had come out, most people were victimizing themselves. One particular statement her mother had said hurt her the most. The family was going through a rough time. Their house had been repossessed, it was discovered that Katie was infertile, neither her father nor mother were working, and Emily had come out to them just the day before the repossession.

_'Emily, you are not gay. I would never give birth to such a freak. It's immoral.'_

_ "Mum, I'm not a freak! You're supposed to be my fucking mother, can't you just take me seriously for once? I'm sorry, this is something I can't change!" Emily had been on the verge of tears._

_ "Emily, you're just making It up. You've been jealous of Katie your entire life, it's obvious. And now you've come up with this 'plan' to be in some kind of spotlight! You need to stop this right now, you're tearing this family apart."_

That was when she lost it.

'_You're tearing this family apart.' _

It had been almost three years since her mother said that, but it still felt like yesterday. She would never forget how broken she felt when her mother blamed her for such a feat. But at the same time, it felt like it was a dream. She knew her mother had always loved her growing up, even if Katie got most of the attention. She couldn't believe her mother, _her own mother_, would say something like that to her. Ever since, she had felt like that was why everything had disintegrated between the Fitch family, and she promised she would never get close to anyone else. She didn't want to ruin anyone else.

But then she met Naomi. They had become friends quickly, but Emily couldn't help feeling more than that. Not necessarily a _relationship_, at least not yet. But she felt the word 'friend' was very under-defining of how she felt about Naomi.

She felt gentle tears falling, dribbling down her chin and to the ground. She sat herself on a bench for a few moments, regaining her composure.

Every step she took since the bench trumpeted that same line in her head.

_'You're tearing this family apart.'_

She found that what hurt her even more is that Katie wouldn't stand up for her.

She found herself on the corner of Naomi's street and braced herself for the longest walk of her day; the walk to Naomi's front door. She prepped herself with a few rehearsed lines she had thought up between the park and now. When she found herself at the door, she raised her hand, hesitated slightly, considered running, but then pounded the door with three gentle taps.

No answer.

She grew a bit frantic, and rapped three more times, slightly harder. She thought she had heard something shuffle inside, but there was still no answer. She resigned herself to step down from the step leading to the door, and began making her way back from where she came. She reached the corner when the familiar voice came to her.

"Emily, is that you?" Emily stopped walking and stood for a few moments, waiting for an approach or another call. After nothing, she turned. Naomi was standing about 20 feet from her. "What are you doing here?" Her arms were crossed around her waist, holding a tan cardigan over her body, protecting herself from the light but chilly winds.

"I, uh, I wanted to talk to you. About last night." She shifted awkwardly on her feet. "Is that okay?" Naomi's face held a look of exhaustion, and irritation. But there was just a slight hint of want. A hint of _need_. And Emily could see it. But when Naomi didn't answer, she called back. "I'll just go, we can talk later." She turned on her heel once more and began walking again. She made it to the corner before being stopped again.

"No, stay. I—We can talk." Emily could sense the emotions Naomi was feeling right now through her voice, What she couldn't tell though, was if they were good or bad.

She returned to Naomi, standing by her side. Naomi led them back to her house, preparing them both mugs of hot chocolate. They migrated to the bedroom, spending the first ten minutes or so in silence, the only sounds being the sipping and swallowing of the steamy drinks.

"Naomi…why did you run out last night?" Emily looked at her, trying to show as much sympathy and truth through her eyes. She wanted Naomi to know that she could talk to her. She knew that Naomi wasn't feeling sick again. She could just tell. When Naomi dropped her gaze and swirled her hot chocolate some more, Emily dropped the subject, returning everything to silence once more.

"I was scared."

Naomi's statement was far from what Emily had been expecting to hear.

"…What?"

"I was scared." Naomi returned her crystal blue eyes to Emily's, showing just as much feeling as her voice was. "I don't know what it is. We've only known each other for a week, or so, but I can't help feel something _more._" Naomi straightened up a bit. "And when I saw you, with Effy, I—I just lost it." She had a newfound dignity and confidence in her voice.

"Emily, I think I really like you." Emily's heart was racing. It was exactly what she wanted to hear, but she knew it was the last thing that should have happened. "Do you understand?"

Her eye's dropped from Naomi's against her will, and she felt the bed shift slightly as Naomi's body, once full with confidence, slumped down again. "No. I don't."

"Emily, what do you mean?" Naomi's voice was dripping with anxiety.

"Naomi. I need you to understand something," Emily took a deep breath. "Something that's extremely hard for me to say, but I know I have to. It's not that I haven't thought the same thing, I have. Really. But I can't do this. I just fuck people up. I wouldn't be able to live it down when I fucked you over." She tried to stand, muttering. "I think I should go now." When her body rendered itself incapable of supporting itself, she nearly toppled over before Naomi caught her, placing a hand on her back. She led Emily back down to the bed, taking both her and Emily's drinks to her bedside table. Emily buried her head in her knees, while Naomi sat down next to her.

"Emily…" Naomi's voice faltered a bit. "I've never been this open to anyone. Ever. You can't just sit there, and say…no."

Naomi, you don't understand.." The line repeated through her head again.

_'You're tearing the family apart.'_

And she continued. "I just tear people apart."

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><p><em> I originally had alot more planned for this chapter, but I decided to divide it into two chapters. So I'll be starting the next as soon as this is uploaded.<em>

_First of all, I need to credit a fabulous musician, known as Meredith Godreau, or Gregory & The Hawk._

_Not for a second was I going to try and write a song of my own for this, so that's who the song in this chapter is by. It's called 'Boats & Birds" if you're interested, really great song._

_Anyways, enjoy this chapter, The writing is getting alot easier as the story goes on._

_Reviews make my day :D_


	6. Chapter 6

_I just wanted to thank you all for all the reviews I've gotten so far! It really means so much to me, and I love very one of you. _

_Now, here's the next chapter. I had started it then scrapped the whole thing, so I hope it's alright!_

* * *

><p>Naomi sat there, stunned. The words Emily had just said were incomprehensible. She definitely heard them, but couldn't understand what they were trying to say to her.<p>

"Emily, what—" Naomi couldn't even finish her sentence before Emily was out the door.

"I'm leaving."

"Emily-Ems, wait!"

The door slammed, the bright red hair and the petite little girl now just a ghost. Naomi felt like she had just been thrown into a black hole. A dark, unknown place. And she was sure she wouldn't make it out of there alive. But dammit, she would at least try. She had never found herself to be so confident, and she wasn't about to throw that away. With that, she followed quickly in Emily's footsteps, and as she reached the stairs, she saw the bright red hair whipping through the frame as the front door closed. Pounding down the steps, she sloppily forced a pair of sneakers on her feet, careful not to waste any time. Outside, the previously calm winds were whipping a bit stronger now, the cold air nipping Naomi's ears. She looked left, she looked right. But Emily wasn't anywhere to be seen. _'No, she couldn't have gotten that far already.'_ She did a double-take to find the repeated disappointment, and began walking the way she knew Emily had come. She panicked, frantically scanning the area around her. When she finally located the redhead, it was no surprise she had missed the fragile girl the first time. Emily had tucked into a driveway and was sitting on the ground, leaning against a house. Her head was buried, but her body was so still, Naomi wouldn't have known the girl was even alive if they hadn't just spoken.

"Emily…" Naomi slowly approached the seemingly lifeless body. "Emily, look at me." The body didn't move. "Emil—"

"What do you want from me? Naomi, I can't do this, I've told you." The girl's head snapped up to reveal the most bloodshot pair of eyes Naomi had ever seen. Her cheeks were bright red and coated in tears, and her cute little button nose matched her hair. Naomi's heart plummeted, along with her confidence. Naomi's guilt struck from the thought that Naomi had been the cause of Emily's tears right now. "Just…go…away."

Naomi crouched down, placing a hand on Emily's knee. "Emily, I can't leave now. Not when you're like this. I…" She halted, and sighed. "I just want to take care of you right now, you're a mess." Naomi reached for Emily's hand, only for it to be yanked away and buried within Emily's chest. "Emily, I'm sorry." Naomi's head dipped. "Just forget I said anything."

She felt Emily stand, letting her hand fall and barely graze the ground. She found a tiny pebble to occupy her hand with, and fiddled with it for a few moments before joining Emily. As she stood alongside Emily, she looked to her, giving her the most sympathetic look she could muster up. She wanted to tell her it was okay, and that they were okay, with her eyes.

She opened her mouth to speak, but was quickly silenced by Emily. She wasn't aware of what was going on, all she knew was that Emily was suddenly very close. The it hit her. Emily was _kissing_ her. _'Wait, what the hell is going on?'_ She knew that it shouldn't have happened and that she should have ended it, but she refused. She wanted this, and it proved to be everything she had hoped for and more. She kissed back lightly, savoring the moment, and before she knew it, it was over.

"I'm sorry." Emily had whispered so quietly that it was barely audible. Emily was soon spinning on her heels, trudging away.

"Emily…"

"I'll call you tomorrow, yeah?" She called over her shoulder.

"Yeah, sure. Definitely." This time, Naomi was speaking solely to herself. She touched her fingers to her lips gently. "Emily…"

The call never came. Emily hadn't been in class, nor would she answer any of Naomi's calls or texts. Two weeks had gone with no sign of her. Naomi visited her dorm daily, but every time she went, the door was locked. She would peer in through the window to a room devoid of Emily, with her belongings remaining. Books still littered her table and CDs were still stacked high in their place aside the stereo. There was even a neatly folded pair of jeans thrown over the edge of the bedframe and sneakers resting sloppily on the floor. Day after day, nothing had changed.

It was approaching mid-autumn, and the warm weather that had greeted the new school year was running, being replaced by the chilly October winds. Naomi walked across the school grass, crunching the colorful leaves that had fallen to the ground, making her daily trip to Emily's dorm. She tugged her sweater around her tightly, preparing herself for the same disappointment she faced every day for the past month. The last month had been one of the worst periods of her life. She was terrified, angry, and broken. She was scared of the future, fearing that someday she might hear the news that Emily had been hurt, or had even harmed herself. She was angry, upset at the way Emily just left, without returning her anxious calls. And she felt broken, like a part of her had left. Even though she and Emily weren't together, Naomi liked just having a friend. With Emily gone, she didn't have even that.

She approached the dorm house, without even bothering for the door. She aimed straight for the window to peek in once again. This time, however she was greeted with a room that had been robbed of everything. All that remained was a few strewn papers and an upside down book. She gaped in disbelief and frantically tried opening the window. After repeated failure, she made her way to the door to find it slightly cracked and the door handle destroyed. She thought angrily to herself. _'No.' _She pushed through the door into the empty room, picking up the stray papers and upturned book. She admired the papers, which were blank, and the novel; it was Emily's favorite, Looking For Alaska. She felt a tinge of sadness, knowing someone would defile Emily's favorite book in such a way. Because it was Emily's favorite, Naomi tucked it into her bag, promising to herself to protect it. She scanned the room for any sign that Emily had been here herself, but the chances of that were slim, and Naomi knew it. She set the papers on the bedside table, and opened a few of the drawers, in the very bottom drawer, she found a slip of paper, folded delicately into a tiny square.

_'Naomi, if you happen to read this, I'm sorry. But I needed to leave. Everything has been so fucked up lately, I couldn't handle it. I've gone to London to see my mum, to see if she's still upset over my coming out. Please understand, I didn't leave because of what happened between us. Just know that I'm okay where I am. I don't know if I'll be returning though. If not, I guess this is goodbye. I love you.'_

Naomi's heart shattered. Just when she thought she couldn't feel any worse, she was proven wrong. She read the note over and over again, every time she faced the same disappointment. '_Oh my God, what if I never see here again? This isn't happening. I can't be.'_ A single tear rolled down her cheek, and she sat on the bed that was once Emily's, curling herself up in the cold blankets. They smelt vaguely of vanilla, a smell that had become familiar to Naomi without her realizing it. It comforted her, and she drifted off in to a light sleep, tears still slipping down her face.

She dreamed that she was falling through a black space of nothing. There was only a faint light at the end, growing smaller and smaller as she fell. Went she stopped the falling, the area around her was also black. But it was warm. She felt comfortable. She was alone in the room, and the light was now gone. She held her hand in front of her face, unable to see it. She sat herself down on the ground, but from then on, she was unsure of what exactly happened afterwards.

When she woke, it was pitch black outside. The stars appeared in small numbers, courtesy of the obnoxious city lights. She was still in Emily's bed, with the blankets cocooning her. She sat up, and checkered her phone greeting 7 missed calls, all from her mother. It was well past midnight, and the cold wind was blowing in through the smashed door. Naomi sprang up, realizing that she had classes tomorrow. She knew she would never get to sleep now, but proceeded to return home anyways. The cold has numbed and reddened her ears in mere minutes, and her nose was running. From crying or the cold, she didn't know. Her walk carried her through the park, where the swings and slides lay abandoned. She looked up, and watched as gentle flakes of snow began descending to the earth. One by one, they landed softly on her face, and it made her feel at peace, although her mind kept drifting back to Emily. To her bright red hair, miniature frame, adorable button nose, and that vanilla scent that Naomi had quickly decided was the sweetest scent in the world.

She pulled her phone from its home in her pocket, and risked sending Emily one last text.

_'Hey, I found your note. Someone's broken into your room, sorry about that. I hope everything's going okay. I'm really going to miss you, Emily. Goodbye.' _

Naomi was on her doorstep before she had even realized it, and was pushing it open just as her mother came pounding down the stairs.

"Jesus Christ Naomi, it's after midnight! Where the fuck have you been?" Her mother was still in her work clothes, which told Naomi that she had been up, waiting.

"Sorry, Mum. I just…haven't had a good day." Naomi tried to push past her mother to her bedroom, but her mother pulled her back before she could get very far.

"That's no reason to be home after midnight. _After fucking midnight!_ I was worried sick about you. You didn't answer my calls—"

"Yeah, Mum. I know. I'm sorry. Can we talk in the morning? I'm tired." She looked her mother in the eye, and saw the pain and worry staring back at her. Of course, she felt bad. But she had her reasons,

"Naomi—oh my god, have you been crying?" She wrapped her arms around her daughter tightly. "Naomi, dear, what's going on? Are you okay?"

"No Mum, I'm not. I'll tell you in the morning. I just want to go upstairs, and sleep." She knew very well the latter wouldn't be happening, but it was the best excuse.

"Well, dear. Okay." Naomi began making her way up the steps again. "You weren't raped, were you?"

Naomi grunted. "No, Mum. I haven't been _raped._"

"Oh, well, good night dear-"

Naomi slammed the door before her mother could pester her anymore.

She sat on her bed, removing the book from her back and the note from her pocket. This was all she had left of Emily, and she was going to cherish it for the rest of her life. She set the book on her pillow and examined the note by itself. '_I don't know if I'll be returning though. I love you.'_ Why wouldn't she come back? What did she mean by…'I love you?' After scanning through every possible meaning her mind created, she set the note down and retrieved the book. She had already read this once before, thanks to Emily. But she opened the book anyways and began reading again. Every line reminded her of Emily and the tears resumed. Losing track of how long she had been reading, she found herself somehow growing exhausted again. She cuddled into her blankets, becoming consumed within her mind, somehow lulling her to sleep again. But just as she was falling asleep, her phone vibrated in her pocket, revealing a text from Emily.

'_Hey, I'm really sorry. But thank you for understanding. I won't forget you.'_

Naomi's heart soared at the feeling of Emily finally responding. Now she knew Emily was okay. But she quickly became worried. '_I won't forget you.'_ Did that mean for certain that Emily wasn't going to come back? Naomi panicked a bit and debating sending another message, but then decided against it. Emily remembered her, and that was enough to make her night bearable. She went to sleep happier than she could ever remember.

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><p><em>Hope you enjoyed. You know those reviews are what keeps me going ;D<em>


	7. Chapter 7

Emily sat patiently on the couch she once could call her own, as her mother paced back and forth, muttering to herself, just loudly enough for Emily to understand.

"Emily, you can't just waltz back in here and expect everything would be just fucking peachy. You haven't been here in almost 6 years, then you just show up, what the hell are you thinking?" Her mom glanced at her, her face bearing a look of anxiety mixed with joy. She must have been glad to see Emily, she was her daughter after all. But to see that Emily was still going through her 'phase' was what upset her. Jenna Fitch, the model mother, couldn't give birth to a dyke. Never. It just wasn't right.

Emily sat contemplating her next move; should she speak up, or wait for her mother to continue? She received a deathly glare from her mother and took that as an indication to justify herself. "Well, Mum, I wanted to talk to you, as an adult. I'm 21, do you really think this is still just some 'phase'?" Her mother flinched slightly. "You don't really know how much it hurts to have a parent give up on you like this. It's the shittiest feeling there is, believe me. I'm just trying to be myself, trying to be truthful. But you didn't accept that, and I was hoping, that maybe, you had changed your mind." Emily gave her mother a hopeful and saddening face, and the elder just grunted and turned away.

"Emily, what _you_ don't understand is that I'm just looking for what's best for you. I do still care about you, and I'm worried for you. You've heard on the news, the stories about kids like...you."

"Kids like me? What in the hell is that supposed to mean? I'm not some sort of freak, Mum."

"Oh, Emily, you know what I mean. Kids who are just…different." She halted her pacing, resting on the arm of the couch with her arms folded insecurely across her chest. "I just want you to be safe. If something happened to you like one of those awful stories, I'd die. Really."

Emily was a little surprised at her mother's words, just because she had never heard her mother so sincere about anything. Not with Katie, or James, or her father. She had expected her mother would have come around by now. No, she just really hoped she would have. A heavy silence lingered over them, and they both were fidgeting awkwardly, looking at anything other than each other's eyes. A dull pounding from the garage interrupted their silence. Emily looked curiously, and as if her mother, as if she knew what she was going to ask, answered knowingly.

"That's your father, and James. Dad's still working on some new invention like he always has been, forcing James to help him." They both chuckled lightly, and Emily gave her mother a small smile. She really enjoyed seeing her mother again. She was gestured forward towards the door. She tapped gently, and pushed the door open just enough for her to peek through. Sure enough, James was sitting underneath a weird contraption that was somehow strapped to a chair. His face bore pain, and it was clear that the elder Fitch's invention wasn't working too well. Slowly, she stepped through, careful not to distract either of them, for fear of James injuring himself in this new and unknown device.

"Oh, come on James! You can hold it higher than that kid! You're a Fitch for crying out loud!" The father barked at his son while the younger struggled to keep the surely heavy…thing held high.

"I'm trying Dad! We've been at this all day, and I'm starting to get a bit sore."

Jenna interjected from behind Emily, "Rob, I need to speak to you for a second." She quickly ushered Emily behind her, clearly hoping to surprise her husband and son. When Rob failed to comply, she raised her voice. "ROB!" James yelped, dropping the weight, as Mr. Fitch let out a hearty yell. "Something's come up, dear. It's really quite important."

"Yeah? Well, what is it?"

Emily stepped out from behind her mother, exhaling a single huge breath, and lamely waved her hand. "Hey, Dad." Her father stood there breathless, as James came to stand beside him, their faces holding the same look of complete surprise. "It's been a while, yeah?"

"Emily…what's going on? What—how—" Rob cut himself short, unsure of what exactly to say. He looked helplessly at Jenna, while James shifted his gaze between the other three. Lazily rubbing his scruff, Rob circled a few times before finally finding the right words to say to his daughter. "Emily, it's really great to see you. That you're here, and…it's like we've almost got the entire family back."

James took this as an easy way out of the awkward circle that had formed. "Should I go call Katie?" He looked expectant, and when his mother nodded, he almost galloped away in his joy to get out of there. The beeping from the house phone could be heard, and the others attempted to listen, but as the beeping quickly became faint, it was clear that James had walked away. Instead, they returned to their own gathering.

Rob spoke up again. "Emily, what's—Why are you here? Nothing happened, right?"

"No Dad, nothing happened. I just felt, that, it had been too long. I was a bit childish when I left, I realize, and I kind of wanted to make it up to you guys. I'm sorry." She offered a quaint smile.

"Aww love, it's doesn't matter. Honestly, I think you were kind of right for leaving the way you did. Your mother and I…" He glanced at his wife briefly. "We weren't very helpful then, we only tried to change you. We were…some pretty shit parents." He let out a sarcastic laugh while being gifted with an insulted glare from Jenna. "But, now we realize that _this_ is who you are. And you're still our little girl, and we wouldn't change that for anything." He gave a smile, a serious one this time, and pulled the other two in for a famous Fitch hug, although no Fitch hug was complete without…

"Katie?" Rob let go, allowing Emily and Jenna to spin around to find the bolder Fitch twin in the doorway, with an eager James just behind.

"James just rang me and said that…"Her sentence remained unfinished as she stared down her not quite identical twin. "Emily..."

"Hey, Katie." Emily took a step forward just as Katie launched her fist into the side of her head.

"Bitch. You think you can just show up after abandoning us for what, five, six years?" She spat angrily.

"KATIE!" Jenna's eyes widened "What the hell?"

"Mum, this bitch thinks she can just walk back in here like nothing's happened!" She turned her glare back to Emily. "She _abandoned _us, I'm not letting her back in that easily." Katie folded her arm across her chest. "So, _Emsy_, have you got anything to say for yourself?"

"Emsyshem."

Katie's strong stance crippled almost immediately. "What?"

"Emsyshem." Emily stayed strong, although her face felt like it had been hammered into a wall. Katie Fucking Fitch sure knew how to punch.

"You're speaking Twin…We haven't done that in years." Katie stood down and watched as her younger sister stood taller. "I don't even remember much of it…"

"Oh. I see." Emily wasn't sure if she felt upset that her twin had forgotten their biggest secret bond, or childish that she still tried to hold on to such a useless thing. "Well, I'm sorry, Katie." Emily let her strength falter, slouching where she stood. "I hope you can understand, and forgive me." Katie stood there with no response. "Please."

Katie looked Emily in the eyes, and gave her a faint smile. "I suppose I have to. You're my sister after all." They exchanged a long hug, both tearing up as they held each other. Katie whispered, "Katieshem." As she rubbed her hand up and down Emily's back. After they split apart, Katie chuckled, "And I _suppose_ I owe you for passing my history final when I was beaten with a rock." They shared a laugh, and Katie spoke up again. "God, it's really sad, you know?" She began crying harder, and stuttered. Jenna and Rob excused themselves from the room, giving Kate and Emily privacy. "We've just wasted five years. Not speaking. And now we'll never be able to get that back." She was crying heavily now. "I missed it. The way things were. When we were best friends. I missed you, Emily. I missed you so much." They linked hands, and Katie dragged them upstairs to their old bedroom. "After we left, Mum and Dad left everything. Just in case, you know, something happened." She reached under her own bed pulling out a thick, leather book. "I put this together after you left, hoping you'd be able to see it someday." She handed the book to her twin, who flipped through it idly. It was a photo album of the two of them. From when they were babies just up until Emily's departure. Together, they sat, flipping through it, reliving every memory in the very place most of them had occurred.

"I think we need to celebrate." Katie piped.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, this is the first time the fabulous Fitch twins have been together in almost five years, this is a huge event!" Katie hopped up. "I'm gonna drive down to the liquor store, d'you want to come?"

"Um, no. I think I'll have a shower, I haven't since yesterday. I've been on a damn train all day. Unless you want me to come?"

"Well, if I didn't want you to come I wouldn't have asked. But if you want to shower, then that's fine. Promise I'll be quick." She pecked Emily on the cheek and was soon out the door. Emily went to fetch her suitcase, which she had left in the backyard in case her parents refused to talk still. She fumbled through in search of some old boxers and a t-shirt she had packed specifically for pyjamas. When she returned from her shower, she discovered she had a new message. From Naomi. She thought that she'd feel a little upset at this, she was upset at herself for just leaving her the way she did, but she actually felt cheery about it. She opened the text, reading;

'_Hey, I hope everything's going okay. Just wanted to know how it all went. I understand it's not my business, just wanted to know if you were okay. But I'll leave you alone forever now, promise.'_

She giggled happily to herself. It had been years since she had been this happy.

_'Everything's fine. Thanks for asking. It's great, actually. A lot better than I thought it would be.'_

She sent that first text, then opened a fresh one.

'_But you don't have to go away forever…'_ She debated actually sending it, and after a small battle in her mind, she decided that she would. Just as it had been sent, the door was kicked open by Katie, who was carrying two bags full of alcohol.

"Ready to party, bitch?"

"You fucking know it."

* * *

><p>Naomi immediately regretted sending that text to Emily. But she couldn't help not knowing how she was. She laid on her bed, flipping aimlessly through one of her research books, looking at pictures that she couldn't even tell what they were of. None of it mattered to her. Somehow, the last time she had texted Emily, she felt unstoppable. But now, she was even miserable than before. She hadn't been to her classes in two days. She had barely even left her bedroom, except a few trips for cigarettes and alcohol. It had finally sunk in, that she may never see Emily again. She had spent the last two days so fucked up, trying to cover up the pain. To push it all away. And then there she was, drained of her cigarettes and alcohol, and all of the emotions were coming back, pouring back into her mind. She need to contact Emily, and had already sent the text before she actually realized what she was doing.<p>

She felt her phone vibrate in her hand, and almost jumped from the shock. She had been counting on _not_ receiving a response. And now that she had, she realized she was unsure if she even wanted to read it. She feared that Emily had gotten sick of her, and that this could end their friendship.

_'Friends. It never went any farther than that…'_ Naomi thought to herself. She sighed, convincing herself she was ready for whatever it said, even though she knew she wasn't. But her heart leapt when she read it.

'_Everything's fine. Thanks for asking. It's great, actually. A lot better than I thought it would be.'_

Naomi smiled to herself, content with the message. She sat thinking about what might have happened, fighting back the urge to send another, when her phone lit up again.

'_But you don't have to go away forever…'_

She didn't want to reply. She wanted to leave Emily alone. She was being teased, and she knew it. But she couldn't help it.

'_So then come back.'_

* * *

><p>"So, how long are you staying here for?"<p>

Katie's question caught her by surprise. She hadn't really thought about what she was going to do after.

"I don't know. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. If I leave, I mean."

Katie eyes gaped. "Well, you've got to finish uni, don't you? What else do you even have if you don't?"

"I should, yeah. But I don't know anymore. I've felt so fucked up lately, I hadn't really thought that far ahead." Emily's body tensed, and her grip on the vodka bottle tightened.

"Ems, what happened?" Katie placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"I don't really know. I couldn't figure it out. So I just left. I'm not sure if I can go back." She sniffled once. "And besides, I've been told someone's broken into my dorm on campus, so I don't really have anything left." Emily giggled, little drops of vodka splashing onto her skin.

"Ems. This isn't funny!" Katie slapped her arm playfully, unable to prevent herself from laughing along.

"No, it's not."

"Did you meet a girl?"

"What? What makes you think that?"

"Oh come on, Emily. It's obvious. You met her, and then you were too afraid to get with her."

"How did you even come to that?"

"Look, you're my fucking sister. I can read you like a book. Besides, you've got a text from…"She reached her hand to the phone. "…_Naomi._ Who is this _Naomi?"_

"What the fuck? Give me that." Tearing the phone from her sister's hand, she opened the text.

'_So then come back.'_

She was unsure of what to say at that point, and merely closed the phone and tossed it onto the bed. She was too fucked by this point to think of a coherent reply, and decided she just wanted the rest of the night to be about her and Katie only. Katie had turned away, respecting Emily's privacy.

"Katie?"

"What?"

Emily held the bottle towards here.

"Cheers."

"Cheers right back, bitch."

* * *

><p><em>I don't know if I like this. I mean I do, but just a little iffy about it. Just let me know what you think?<em>

:|


	8. Chapter 8

_I don't know if anyone is actually keeping up with this story (I doubt any one is, but anyways) I apologize sincerely for not updating in so long. I honestly had no idea with what I wanted to do with this story, and I'm not even sure how much I like this chapter, but I really wanted something updated. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy it, cause I'm not sure I do :p_

_*** To anyone who may have been confused: **Chapter Seven backtracks a little bit, to Emily's arrival the day she left. Just so no one is confused. This chapter is based back in the regular time frame of this story._

* * *

><p>Naomi wandered into her English classroom. It was after hours, and despite this room beginning the flashback of a memory of meeting Emily, she went anyways. She had been waiting for Emily to return, although she was unsure if she even would. It was crazy, she realized, how everything can change for a single person, but nothing else would be affected. The classroom had been the exact same since the beginning of the school year, yet she had changed so much as a person, sometimes she thought she had actually become someone new. Had she not met Emily, everything would still be the same. Her mind was completely different. She had even made a few friends aside from Emily. Meeting her had given Naomi the courage to open up to others, and to actually depend on them. Of course, she was still conscious about being forgotten, but she knew that without risks, she may have ended up with no one at all in the end. And although it had been months since she actually saw Emily, she still had hoped that she'd be back. She needed to thank her for making her realize it was okay to open up to people.<p>

"Hey, Blondie. What are you doing in my classroom after hours?" Mr. Cassan snuck up behind her, holding a teasing smile.

"Oh, nothing. Sorry. I'll go." Naomi began to bring herself to the door when he stopped her.

"I'm just kidding. I'm actually glad you're here, I wanted to give you something." He reached behind his desk and rummaged through his briefcase. "I was going to give it to you in class today, but I forgot." He held out a book to her. "Neil Gaiman."

"Mmm, I've heard of him." She turned the book around to read the cover. "Good Omens. I'll read it quick. Promise." She gave a cheesy, half-hearted smile.

His eyes came to life with a look of sincerity and concern. "Naomi, are you okay? You haven't really been yourself lately." He sat on the desk next to her. "Your assignments haven't been as good as usual, and I know you can do better than that."

She sighed, her eyes fluttering shut before she responded. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired."

"Of?"

"Things."

"What kind of things?"

"People things."

Mr. Cassan shrugged. "I get it, you don't want to talk about it. But just know that if you ever need to, I'm here."

"Yeah, thanks." Naomi checked her watch. "I've got to go. I'll see you tomorrow."

They gave their goodbyes and Naomi left the room taking herself to her locker. Before long, she heard the familiar booming voice of her closest and newest companion.

"Hey, Naomikins. I was just looking for you!"

"Hey, Cook."

"I thought you forgot about me, girl. I've been waitin' outside for almost twenty minutes!"

"Yeah, sorry. Talking to a teacher."

"Ah, my little girl. Trying to get it in with the professor, eh? Always knew you were a classy girl." He smiled his sarcastic grin, earning him a punch in the arm.

"Fuck off Cook, you knob."

"Woah, Blondie. Just kiddin', yeah?" He feigned pain in his arm. "Now, what do you say we find some good shit tonight?"

Naomi shrugged with a smile, indicating her agreement.

"Yeah, that's right, Blondie!" Cook clapped her on the back, and the two walked on confidently.

* * *

><p>They had somehow stumbled upon a raging house party, and inside, Cook was already in his usual antics. He'd gone off at least four times, with a different girl each time, Naomi had spotted. <em>'Wish I could get four different girls in one night.'<em> Naomi's thought were rampant, and she found herself disgusted with the things she was thinking. _'What the fuck, I'm not like that. It's the booze.' _She helped herself to another beer after finishing her third. _'Fuck it, I'm twenty-one. I'm allowed to get fucked up like this. Make up for all the time lost when I was a pussy teenager.'_ She found a girl staring at her, almost seductively. She smiled, and was motioned over by the other girl. Without a though, she followed.

"Hey, what's your name?"

"Naomi." She was suddenly very nervous. She had never actually done anything sexually, with anybody, and realized how inexperienced she actually was. And then there was the cute girl calling for her. _'Fuck.'_

"Naomi…I like that. I'm Sophia." She smiled again. She was dressed in a baggy tank top, almost styled like a dress. It reminded her of Effy. Underneath, she styled a pair of black jean shorts and ended with a pair of high topped sneakers that extended to just below her kneecaps. "You here with anyone tonight?"

"Just a mate, but he's fucked off."

Sophia giggled. "I meant anyone _special._"

"Nope."

"Bored?"

"A bit."

Sophia's never-fading smile grew wider.

"Come with me then."

Before she could think straight, Naomi was being tugged through clusters of people and up a staircase, and in a blur she found herself in a bedroom with Sophia.

"So, _Naomi_, what do you want to do?" Sophia started unlacing her shoes, occasionally glancing up, expecting an answer.

"Um, I'm not really sure—I'm not very experienced with that kind of stuff…" Naomi figured she should just spill instead of getting this girl's hopes up. It's not like she'd ever see her again, so there was no need to be embarrassed.

"Aww, you're a virgin." She had finally finished with her shoes and gave Naomi a hard stare. "Cute." Quickly, Naomi had found the girl on top of her and their lips were smashing together. '_Fuck it.'_ She began trying to mimic the other girl's actions, hoping to find some way to do it right. After a few intense minutes, Sophia broke them apart, wiping her lips. "Not bad.." She quickly tied her hair back and stripped off her shirt. "..for a virgin."

Naomi then found herself being pleasured in ways she had never imagined possible.

'_Holy shit, what have I missed?'_

* * *

><p>Naomi woke the next morning, to four text messages, all from Cook.<p>

'_Hey, Blondie, where are you? I'm leaving, this party's rubbish.'_

'_Where'd you fuck off to? I've been looking for almost an hour,'_

'_Naomi, are you okay? You don't usually go missing like that.'_

'_I'm coming to your house to find you. If you're not there, I'm gonna fucking hunt you down, got it?'_

The last text had come in only about twenty minutes ago, she noticed. "Shit." She forced herself to recall the night before to find that she couldn't remember much of it. She remembered arriving, and she remembered Cook fetching her those first few beers. And she remember Sophia.

'_Oh God.'_ She was unsure if she was thinking about last night being a bundle of fuck-up, or how great it felt when she was with Sophia.

Feeling the ache in her head pounding, she remained on her bed, hoping Cook was at least quiet when he walked in. She heard a few yells downstairs, between what sounded like an older man and his son. Quickly, she sat up, do everything she could to ignore the pounding, to find that she wasn't actually in her own room.

"For fucks' sake, Freddie! When are you gonna grow up?" Naomi figured Freddie was the son, and realized that he was probably the one guilty for the party the night before. "Shit!' She exclaimed it a bit louder this time, and looked frantically for a way out of this mess. She heard footsteps coming up the stairs and getting nearer. "Shit! Shit, shit! Fuck!" She ran towards the window, hoping there was a way out before whoever had come upstairs spotted her. Unfortunately for Naomi, there was no way out, and the door had opened, revealing a tan, floppy haired boy. He was tall and lanky, spotting scrapes up and down his arms.

"Shit! Sorry!" Naomi felt her cheeks blush as she awkwardly stood in this stranger's room.

"Were you at the party last night?"

"Yeah, sorry. I fell asleep, I guess. I'm really, really sorry about this."

"It's no biggie. If you want, I'll go distract my dad and you and can get out."

"That'd be great, thanks." She held back from following him. "Are you Freddie?"

"Yeah."

"Sorry."

"For what?"

"It sounds like your dad's not too happy."

Freddie shrugged. "It doesn't matter. He 's just getting bored with his life, looks for any excuse to yell at me. He's scolding me for not vacuuming properly."

"Really? I thought it was about the party."

"Nah. It's pretty ironic, really. He doesn't even know it happened."

"Oh. Well, still. Sorry, about this."

"It's fine. If you don't mind me asking, what's your name?"

"Naomi."

Freddie held out his hand. "Naomi… This was quite the way to meet, but hope I see you 'round sometime."

"Same."

Freddie ushered her out of the room. "I'm gonna go get my dad's attention and distract him, and then you can leave, okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay. Well, see you, Naomi."

"Bye, Freddie."

Naomi honestly had no idea where she was, or how to find her way back home. Reluctantly, she texted Cook, realizing she had no other choice. Almost instantly, her phone started ringing and he was on the other line, barking in her ear.

"_Jesus, Naomi! Where've you been? I've been so fucking worried about you!"_

"Cook, I know. Sorry. I fell asleep at the house from last night. I need you to tell me how to get home,"

"_Oh, yeah. Leave it to Cook to save the fucking day after you fuck off and get yourself lost."_

"Hey, you brought me here! It's not my fault!"

"_I know. I didn't mean to yell like that."_ Naomi heard him sigh on the other end. "_I was just really worried."_

"Yeah, I know, Cook. And I'm really sorry about it. I didn't mean for it to happen."

"_Yeah, I know. Sit tight, I'll be there soon."_

"Thanks, Cook."

It was a bit chilly outside, and Naomi hadn't brought a sweater.

"Shit, Cook, hurry up." She spoke solely to herself.

She was waiting for only about fifteen minutes when she spotted Cook coming near her. She stood up and dusted herself off, and made her way over to him. "Cook, thanks."

"No problem, Blondie. No need to get all sentimental."

"Still…"

"So where'd you run off to last night? Random shag?" He laughed to himself, expecting it to not be the case because it was, well, Naomi. After a few moments silence, he looked at her. "Naomi?" His face contorted into a grin resembling a diabetic child with a candy bar. "You did, didn't you? You horny fucking perv!" He clapped her on the bag. "Ah, welcome to the adult world, girlie."

Naomi couldn't help but laugh along with him. It was an unusual topic to be talking about, but it made her feel good. She didn't feel like such an outcast anymore. She felt strong. Legitimately strong, for the first time. Ever. She felt good.

"So how's it feel to finally be a man, Naomikins?"

"Fuck off, Cook. I am still a classy, sophisticated _woman_."

"I bet you are, Naomi. I bet you are."

* * *

><p><em>Again, I apologize deeply for taking so long to update. I've just had some serious writer's block.<em>

_Also, please check out my one-shot that was posted a little while ago. It was my first time writing from Effy's view, and I want to know how I did. I wouldn't normally ask, but this is purely for criticism. Thanks so much._

_Enjoy! :)_


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